Gone but not forgotten... just yet.

It is strange that I am not the least bit afraid of the future. After attending the very first "Post-Op Transgender Support Group" I now find that my life is now taking a life of its own. As our therapist told the initial group of four TS women in attendance, learning to come out, finding out who you are in this interesting world, dressing finding friends, learning the ins and out of being a woman is like being in grade school.

But after the surgery and now living as a woman is what he called going for your Post Doctural Education. You are now in the big leagues and face new challenges. The surgery was the vehicle for which we arrived, life and relationships is what defines us and determines whether we fail as women or males.

So, in keeping with continuing education as a woman, I am taking a well-earned vacation from life, the family and my wife and going alone to visit family in warm and sunny Arizona. It is a sanctuary for which I can talk w/o interference from the family on issues of the heart and for once; live my life even for a five day stretch as that new woman.

Even though everyone knows that I am married, it is the freedom to just say whatever I want to my first cousin (female) on my mothers side and to hear my aunt's talk to me in our Filipino dialect. It is also a time for me and my cousin Meredith to go out and just do girl things; i.e. shopping, go window shopping (she likes PRADA), and just be out watching what else.... GUYS. Oh, she's also married and I'm the auntie to three of her sons. So talking to her about my disastrous attempt with a guy is something I need to get off my chest.

So for five days this girl will leave the stress of trying to find money to pay our bills, not to worry about work and the residents of our Assisted Living facility, not having to listen to my wife of 36 years or listen to the same issues that are plaguing every family in the United States. This will be MY time alone.